Life is filled with chapters, phases, stages, acts and times and the best lives, the ones we want to live, the ones we want to read about or see in the movies, the ones that inspire us are filled to the brink with interesting and challenging chapters and acts, all along the way. But there is an insidious myth in our culture that tells us that basically we only have two chapters in our lives; the work chapter and the retirement chapter. In the first chapter you create the life you want or do the best you can to do that and the second chapter is devoted to maintaining that life, mostly in the form of money and financial security so you can coast on down to the end in comfort.
This myth tells us that by midlife you’ve more or less done what you can do to put all this in place and if you have not, well, you better get busy doing this or all hell will break loose when you get to retirement. This way of living is like telling yourself that by midlife, you have no more dreams, no more challenges to meet, no more excitement, you're just living a life on an endless repeat cycle. How awful! I say rubbish! I say, it’s time to reinvent yourself and your life. I say, create a new phase in your life; incubate a new idea, germinate the seeds of possibility and create a new identity this year. I say, make this the year you do what you’ve always wanted to do. I say, take a risk, see what happens, open yourself up and write a new chapter in your life.
Here are some ways and means for helping you do this:
Winter is Fallow Time - Do some dreaming, some journaling, some brainstorming. Read some books on reinventing your life, read some biographies of people you admire, join a group of like-minded individuals or start one yourself.
Weed the Garden of Your life – Look around you, what’s choking off your life? What is in your life as habit but no longer serves you? Pare down your life. Remember, in order for something to grow in your life there must be room for it – clear a space for your new life.
Begin Gathering the Seeds of Reinvention – Once you have done some brainstorming and have an idea of what you want to do and you have cleared out a space for it, begin to gather the seeds you will need to create your new life. Do research, gather information and begin to lay out the garden of your new chapter. Do this on paper first. Interview others who have done what you want to do – check out the obstacles and challenges.
Address the Yes, Buts – No matter what we want to do it will come with some yes, buts, regardless of how successful you have been in the past – most of us will resist new ideas and new things at some point in the process. In an important way, this is a protection provided by our egos, which we all have as the kind of chairman of the board – the ego wants us to look good and be safe so it will give you a ration of yes, buts when you begin a process of change and new development. Don’t deny the yes, but; hear it and then address the issues raised.
Develop a Plan – Once you have come up with your idea, addressed the yes, buts and interviewed or read about others who have done what you want to do, it’s time to develop a plan. Map our what you want to do and in what order. Start small – Noah didn’t build that ark in a day. You may need a bridge to get you there. This could be in the form of a job or a layered plan of action that is done in stages.
Spring Into Action – By the Spring of this year, if you have done the above you will be ready to plant some seeds of change and start the process of reinventing your life, or at least the beginning chapters of it. As I said, start small and work your way into it.
If this all sounds great to you but you’re not sure you can do it all on your own, then you might want to try my on-line program or join the Second Act Society if you live in Denver. My on-line program is listed on my website: http://www.lorrainebanfield.com/ and the Second Act Society is a Meetup group that meets once a month on Sunday afternoon 2-4 pm. Please check it out at: http://www.meetup.com/Second-Act-Society/
Meanwhile, have a wonderful new year and a happy, healthy and soulful life no matter whether this is the year you reinvent yourself or not.
Blessings, Lorraine
This myth tells us that by midlife you’ve more or less done what you can do to put all this in place and if you have not, well, you better get busy doing this or all hell will break loose when you get to retirement. This way of living is like telling yourself that by midlife, you have no more dreams, no more challenges to meet, no more excitement, you're just living a life on an endless repeat cycle. How awful! I say rubbish! I say, it’s time to reinvent yourself and your life. I say, create a new phase in your life; incubate a new idea, germinate the seeds of possibility and create a new identity this year. I say, make this the year you do what you’ve always wanted to do. I say, take a risk, see what happens, open yourself up and write a new chapter in your life.
Here are some ways and means for helping you do this:
Winter is Fallow Time - Do some dreaming, some journaling, some brainstorming. Read some books on reinventing your life, read some biographies of people you admire, join a group of like-minded individuals or start one yourself.
Weed the Garden of Your life – Look around you, what’s choking off your life? What is in your life as habit but no longer serves you? Pare down your life. Remember, in order for something to grow in your life there must be room for it – clear a space for your new life.
Begin Gathering the Seeds of Reinvention – Once you have done some brainstorming and have an idea of what you want to do and you have cleared out a space for it, begin to gather the seeds you will need to create your new life. Do research, gather information and begin to lay out the garden of your new chapter. Do this on paper first. Interview others who have done what you want to do – check out the obstacles and challenges.
Address the Yes, Buts – No matter what we want to do it will come with some yes, buts, regardless of how successful you have been in the past – most of us will resist new ideas and new things at some point in the process. In an important way, this is a protection provided by our egos, which we all have as the kind of chairman of the board – the ego wants us to look good and be safe so it will give you a ration of yes, buts when you begin a process of change and new development. Don’t deny the yes, but; hear it and then address the issues raised.
Develop a Plan – Once you have come up with your idea, addressed the yes, buts and interviewed or read about others who have done what you want to do, it’s time to develop a plan. Map our what you want to do and in what order. Start small – Noah didn’t build that ark in a day. You may need a bridge to get you there. This could be in the form of a job or a layered plan of action that is done in stages.
Spring Into Action – By the Spring of this year, if you have done the above you will be ready to plant some seeds of change and start the process of reinventing your life, or at least the beginning chapters of it. As I said, start small and work your way into it.
If this all sounds great to you but you’re not sure you can do it all on your own, then you might want to try my on-line program or join the Second Act Society if you live in Denver. My on-line program is listed on my website: http://www.lorrainebanfield.com/ and the Second Act Society is a Meetup group that meets once a month on Sunday afternoon 2-4 pm. Please check it out at: http://www.meetup.com/Second-Act-Society/
Meanwhile, have a wonderful new year and a happy, healthy and soulful life no matter whether this is the year you reinvent yourself or not.
Blessings, Lorraine
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